8. Finding Family

It was quite some time before Harry raised his head and decided he had better get moving. He was surprised that no one had run after him but he wasn’t about to bemoan his fortune. As he idly wandered along the secret passage which he knew would take him to a door near the greenhouses, as long as it hadn’t been blocked or otherwise blown apart during the battle, Harry decided that he needed to return the Elder Wand to Dumbledore’s tomb. He wondered if he could do that without being seen but soon cursed his own idiocy, his Invisibility Cloak was in his pouch along with practically everything else he currently owned, which wasn’t much; his razor (which he most definitely used), three wands, a shard of a mirror, the Marauder’s map, a broken Snitch, a letter from his mother, a baby photo, his Gringotts key and his cloak. As he reached the door at the other end of the passage Harry put the cloak on and slipped outside.

As he passed the greenhouses Harry noticed that Neville had roped a number of Gryffindors in to helping him continue to fix them up. Seamus and Dean were attempting to repair a number of terracotta pots while Lavender, who was still covered in bandages, was watching Parvati levitate overturned tables. Dennis Creevey was sitting in the corner of one greenhouse idly flicking ear muffs back onto a row of hooks in the wall. He looked drawn and pale with circles under his eyes and Harry’s heart clenched as it was filled with the sorrow of Colin’s loss. Dennis must have come back for the memorial, he would have been evacuated as a fourth year. Alicia Spinnet, Angelina Johnson, Katie Bell and Oliver Wood were helping Neville repair the panes of glass in the roof. Assorted sixth years were repotting plants in an already repaired section of the greenhouse.

Well, that explained the empty Common Room. Harry wandered out onto the grounds and dodging various students, families and teachers made his way to the tomb by the lake. The immediate area was deserted, the work to rebuild being carried on in other parts of the castle grounds. As he walked Harry drew the Elder Wand from the pouch around his neck stopping short a scant metre or two from the white tomb. Harry felt a surge of anger as he looked at the devastation that Voldemort had wrought on the final resting place of his mentor. He approached the tomb with trepidation, knowing what he would see inside. It didn’t make it any easier to approach Dumbledore’s body, reach out and place the wand back on the chest of the body.

“Goodbye, sir,” Harry whispered into the stillness. “Thank you for believing in me and trusting in me. I hope I never let you down.” And Harry felt, rather than heard, a voice whisper on the wind,

“You could never let me down, goodbye Harry Potter.” Harry retreated from the tomb, tears glistening in his eyes and cast the strongest spells and charms he could think of to repair and reseal the tomb.

****************

As Harry sat hidden in the shadows of a large bush at sunset, gazing across the lake and skipping stones across the top of the water he felt more at peace than he had done for hours. He twirled the hawthorn wand in his hand while he contemplated the events of the last few hours. He relished the opportunity to sit and think without myriad things to claim his attention. A voice suddenly broke his quiet contemplation.

“The whole castle’s looking for you, Potter,” Draco Malfoy spoke without malice. “Weasley and Granger are going mental and his mother’s practically lost it.” Harry looked down at the wand in his hand and mutely held it out to Malfoy who took it hesitantly.

“The Weaselette’s nearly hysterical,” Malfoy continued, “keeps ranting and raving about losing you. Your whole family’s gone nuts, Potter.” Harry stared at Malfoy in shock.

“I don’t have any family, Malfoy,” Harry rasped, his voice croaky from disuse. “Better go back to your mother before she flips as well.” Malfoy shook his head.

“You don’t get it, do you Potter? That family doesn’t care that you don’t share their genes. You are one of them as surely as if you were born in that hovel.” Harry growled. Malfoy continued,

“Weasel’s dad has gone and organized search parties to scour the castle and told them he’ll not lose another one of his boys. There’s frantic redheads everywhere you turn. I don’t reckon my own mother has ever shown as much concern for the fruit of her loins as that woman is showing for you. Anyone would think she birthed you herself. If you think you’ve got no family you are more touched in the head than Goyle,” he finished. Malfoy shook his head and turned to walk away.

“You’re wrong, you know.”

“Come off it Potter, you must have heard them when they thought you were dead!”

“No, not about the Weasleys,” Harry paused, “about your mother.”

“What would you know about my mother, Potter?” Malfoy spat.

“Your mother betrayed Voldemort for you. He sent her to check that I was dead,” Harry stood and faced Malfoy. “And she told him I was because when she asked, I told her you were alive. She knew that the only way to get into the castle, to get to you, was to convince Voldemort I was dead so that he’d lead them back triumphantly and tell them to surrender instead of just destroying the castle and everyone in it, including you.

“Tom Riddle never knew his mother. He never knew his mother loved him so he didn’t understand the depth of a mother’s love,” Harry had a sudden thought. “I reckon that’s why he and your Auntie Bellatrix got along so well. She didn’t give much thought to a mother’s love either or she never would have taken on Mrs Weasley after trying to throw a killing curse at her daughter.

“My mother’s love for me saved me nearly seventeen years ago. Your mother’s love for you helped save you and everyone else two days ago. Don’t ever think she wouldn’t lay down her life for you, because she would, in a heartbeat.” And with sudden clarity Harry heard Bill telling him exactly the same thing.

Harry noticed the stars that were beginning to twinkle on the dusky horizon and remembered Mrs Weasley’s fear at their late arrival the night before. Glancing at his watch he noted the time meant that dinner was about to get underway in the Great Hall when he noticed some scratches along one side of the face. He mentally shrugged, oh well at least they matched the dents on the back.

“-traditional to give a wizard a watch when he comes of age…it was my brother Fabian’s…it’s a bit dented on the back…”

Harry suddenly took off in the direction of the castle, sprinting towards the great oak door. As he skidded to a stop at the top of the marble steps, breathing hard, Harry heard a commotion coming from inside and if he wasn’t mistaken it was being caused by some Weasleys. He pushed the door open and came face to face with a raised wand.

Because he was breathing hard from running Harry managed to hide the fact that his heart began to thump heavily in his chest and his breathing quickened. He stood petrified, staring down the business end of a wand, unable to move.

‘What is happening to me?’ he thought wildly. He stood there holding his breath, his pulse racing, eyes fixed on the wand. Dimly, as if from far away he heard voices calling his name. The wand moved and Harry breathed. Slowly the rest of the Entrance Hall came into focus. Hermione was there, peering at him concernedly. Had she seen him freeze, no, panic. He’d panicked, had she seen that?

“You people have got to stop pointing wands at me,” he puffed, pushing down the anxiety that threatened to overwhelm him.

“Stop being a git then! Where on earth have you been?” retorted Ron. Harry flinched and shrank back as Ron gave off a very uncanny impression of his mother, only taller. In fact now that Harry thought about it Ron seemed about twice as big as he usually did. “We’ve been looking for you for hours! You can’t just take off like that! How would we know if something had happened to you? Oh we probably wouldn’t, would we? Not until someone brings your body back!” Bill stepped forward, putting his hand on Ron’s shoulder which seemed to shrink him back to normal size.

“That’s enough Ron,” he said softly. “Harry, are you alright?” Harry nodded mutely all too aware of his own palpitating fear that seemed to throb between them like a heartbeat.

“Ron’s just a bit worried about where you’d got to. No one is going to hurt you Harry,” Bill murmured. He had clearly not managed to fool Bill. “Mum’s a bit frantic but if you come and let her feed you she’ll be right.” Harry found his voice.

“Could you check Dumbledore’s tomb when you get a chance, please Bill? I repaired it and sealed it with the strongest charms I know but they are still pretty basic. I’m not sure I know enough about sealing tombs and things.” Bill nodded and Harry took a few deep breaths and fought to control his emotions. Shoving his hands into his pockets, determined to hide the fact that they were shaking, Harry looked around to see who else was in the Entrance Hall.

It looked as though Charlie was the one who’d been brandishing a wand as his still dangled loosely from his hand while he examined Harry critically. Ron had crossed his arms over his chest and was staring defiantly at the floor. Hermione was examining Harry with a very calculating gaze.

“So what’s been going on here, then?” he asked.

“Ron had a slight problem with you running off,” said Charlie. “It’s been making him a bit irrational.”

“I think the events of the past few days are catching up with all of us,” came Mr Weasley’s voice from the shadows. Harry started, he hadn’t seen the Weasley patriarch on his first scan of the Entrance Hall.

“I’m sorry,” Harry said quietly, running a hand through his hair. The shaking had abated and he was feeling more himself again. “I just needed to get away. I needed some time to think.”

“Not to worry Harry, not to worry,” Mr Weasley said. “Let’s get inside and let everyone know we found you.”

“I really am sorry,” said Harry again, staring at the top of Ron’s head, willing him to look up. “Things have been making me a bit, er, jumpy today.”

“Quite alright Harry, quite alright,” said Mr Weasley. “Now how about we go in and call off the search. If we don’t get you in there soon Molly will be out here and I really don’t think we need a repeat of last night on top of everything else.”

Mr Weasley turned and led the way into the Great Hall. There was food on the table but the occupants at one end of the Gryffindor table were not eating it at all. George was staring idly at the table, gouging a small hole it in it with the point of a knife. Mrs Weasley was staring at the fireplace as if waiting for someone to Floo in, Fleur was drumming her fingers on the table, staring fixedly at the water jug and Ginny had drawn her knees up and wrapped her arms around them, all of them ignoring the food Percy was piling onto their plates.

Ron ambled up to them, sat heavily in a chair and started piling his own plate high. His arrival seemed to rouse the other occupants.

“Did you find him, Ron,” his mother demanded.

“Well, he turned up eventually, yes,” Ron said sullenly. Mrs Weasley shrieked and jumped up.

“Well why didn’t you say so!” she demanded and she hurried around the table, her eyes seeking Harry’s as he stood behind Bill. “Are you alright? Where have you been? If you keep disappearing like that you’ll give us all heart attacks!” She seized his face, searching his eyes. Harry fought the urge to pull away. Eventually she released him and pushed him into the chair next to Ginny.

The tension hung over them like a thick blanket as they ate. No one spoke, the hum of other occupants of the room swarmed around them like a low buzz. Harry pushed his food around his plate and suddenly, unable to stand it any longer, he cleared his throat.

“I’m sorry I ran off this afternoon,” he began. “I just needed some time to think.” Ron’s hands started shaking and he dropped his knife. He wouldn’t look Harry in the eye. Hermione’s eyes darted between the two of them; she was studying them as if trying to figure out a giant puzzle.

“I-I’m fine now,” Harry finished.

“Well don’t go disappearing again,” Ron said quietly. “I can’t go through that again. I was scared for you Harry.” He finally looked up at Harry. There was pain radiating from him. “When you took off I couldn’t help it, I thought you weren’t going to come back this time or that something might happen to you. I got so angry that you might be gone. I couldn’t bear it if you didn’t come back.” Hermione sniffed.

“It’s okay,” said Harry, “I’m not going anywhere. I’m here to stay; you can’t get rid of me you know. You guys are my family.”

“Good,” said Ron and he surreptitiously wiped his face with his sleeve as he said it. “Now I think it’s time for pudding.”

Harry turned to look at Ginny. She was playing with her food, her face hidden by a curtain of hair. Harry reached over, putting his hand on hers and he felt her suddenly turn her hand over and grab his tightly. He left his hand resting gently in hers for the rest of the meal.