As the sun set below the horizon, my son was born. My chest
rose and fell with sharp breaths. Tired
beyond belief, pain wracking my body, I saw him.
"Look
at him," I whispered.
"Look at our son."
His small hands were curled into tiny fists, and he was looking around
the room quizzically. He looked so
perfect then, like a baby angel fallen from heaven. Even now, I could see that his features were like those of
his father, the same high cheekbones, same pointed nose. His eyes were grey-blue, like an ocean
on a stormy day, with the waves breaking close to the shore.
I
moved my gaze from my son to his father, and on Lucius' face, I saw something
that I'd never seen there before.
For that one moment, gone was the indifference and the aristocratic apathy,
and in its place was a look of wonder, and, could it be, tenderness? Those grey eyes, usually steely and
cold, seemed, for that second, to contain a kind of warmth. For as long as I had known Lucius, he
had been a guarded man, and emotion was always, in his mind, little more than a
weakness, a tool that others could use to pull your life apart.
And
then, as quickly as it had come, Lucius reapplied his mask of indifference; the
cold shrewdness returned, making his eyes unexpressionless once more.
"He's
a beautiful child," Lucius commented, as unemotionally as ever. "What shall we name him?
I
knew that, in the Wizarding world, it was pureblood practice to name a child as
soon after birth as possible, so, even though my brain felt too tired to think,
I thought for a moment, glancing at the child in my arms. "Draco," I replied at
last. "Draco, my little
dragon"
"Draco
it shall be then," Lucius murmured.
He began to say a series of spells, and moved his wand in a complex
pattern over my son's head. A
small wisp of smoke floated out of the wand, and rose into the air. "Draco Abraxas Malfoy,"
Lucius enunciated clearly. When he had finished speaking, the smoke flew away,
presumably to notify the proper authorities at the Ministry that a child had
been born in the Wizarding world, and to inform them of the child's name. "It is done," Lucius
stated, returning his wand to the sheath hanging from his waist.
Silence
fell upon us three once more. Much as Lucius would deny it, not that I would ever
mention it again, I knew what I'd seen.
For
as long as I had been married, I had always been resigned to the knowledge that
my marriage was little more than a contract, and that my relationship with
Lucius would stay cold, clinical, and would exist more out of duty than out of
any emotion. But even that one
small glimpse of something more in my husband gave me hope. It wouldn't come out often; maybe I
would never see it again, but it didn't matter to me. I knew that deep down, buried under the coldness and the
sense of societal duty, there was some speck of kindness, some spark of
warmth. It would be enough for me;
in truth, it was more than I had ever expected. So I would go on with life, and raise my son, and continue
to be the perfect pureblood wife.
But still, I could keep hoping that someday, I could see sometime in the
future what I had seen today.
It
was over. Finally, the war that
had been tearing us apart for so long was over. I rushed through the masses of people, dead and alive,
searching for them, for Draco and for Lucius. I felt disdainful eyes on me, probably wondering what a
Malfoy was doing here, wondering why I hadn't fled with all of the Dark Lord's
followers. I didn't care. All that mattered to me anymore was
having my family back again.
Besides, I had just saved Potter's life, so wasn't about to turn me in,
I was sure. Ironically, by giving
the boy another chance to kill the Dark Lord, I had set into motion both my own
freedom, and that of my family. No
longer would we be treated like slaves, forced to endanger and humiliate
ourselves in order to do his bidding.
Out
of the corner of my eye, I saw Lucius.
He was rushing through the hall, and he had several bleeding cuts on his
face and arms.
I
ran up to him, grabbed him by the sleeve of his robe, and turned him around to
face me. He seemed both shocked
and confused, fearful and relieved.
"Lucius,"
I whispered, "it's over."
We both knew, but to say it out loud made it seem more real.
"What
do we do?" Lucius asked. His
eyes were sunken, and his voice was tired and apathetic. Azkaban had left him like this; that
much I knew. Ever since that
night two years ago when he had failed the Dark Lord so miserably, I had been
the only strength left in our family, the pillar trying desperately to keep the
building standing, even when it was crumbling around my feet. I should be disgusted with him for what
he did in the Dark Lord's service, should be disappointed in him for following
the Dark Lord blindly so many years ago, but I wasn't. He was alive, and for now, that was
enough for me.
"We
have to find Draco," I whispered, grabbing him by the arm. He could be anywhere, but Potter told
me that he's alive."
Lucius
nodded, and followed beside me.
Together, we searched the castle, calling Draco's name the whole
time. Finally, we found him,
hiding on a fourth floor room. His
blond hair was dirty, and he too was covered in scratches.
"Come
on," I murmured. "We
have to go."
Silently,
my son followed me. Every time
I've see him, I wish that he hadn't been forced to go through the ordeals that
he had experienced. I remember him
when he was just a child, when he still laughed and played and smiled. He was
swept into this war far too early, and now, the person whose footsteps followed
mine was not the spoiled, prideful child that he had once been, but instead an
adult, who had realized that everything he had believed in was not what it had
seemed.
As
the three of us walked in silence, we turned a corner, and came face to face
with Harry Potter, looking triumphant, but tired beyond belief. When he saw the two men following
behind me, his eyes narrowed and he began to draw his wand. I held up a hand, and he seemed to
notice me for the first time. As
Potter's eyes met mine, he loosened his grip on his wand, and stepped a bit
closer.
"Why?"
he asked, so low that only I could hear.
"Why did you help me?"
"That,"
I hissed, "is none of your concern.
I had my reasons, and that is all you need to know. Now, will you let us pass? I give you
my word that none of us will harm you."
Potter's
gaze darted between Lucius, Draco, and I for a few moments before finally
returning his wand to his pocket.
"Fine," he spat.
" But if I see one wrong moveÉ" His voice drifted off
warningly.
"Of
course." I inclined my
head towards him, and walked on down the hallway.
At
last, I allowed myself a smile.
Things were bad, but my family was alive, and now we finally had the
chance to live our lives. There
would be some roadblocks, but we could get past those. I turned to Lucius, and clasped his
hand tightly.
"Let's
go home," I whispered.
"How?" he asked. "They'll take me, and Draco. How would we leave?" It was a bit strange, really, that my husband, usually so
proud and composed, was asking me for guidance and letting me lead the
way.
"We'll find a way. Potter owes me a debt, and he's too honorable not to pay
it."
He seemed to accept that. Honestly, it was a gamble, but if I couldn't count on a
Gryffindor to be noble, than I couldn't count on anything. I may be called
immoral for hoping that those who had done so much wrong wouldn't be punished,
but I didn't care.
I knew that our family was far from innocent, and I held no
delusions that my two broken men would change overnight. But I had hope. We were alive, and that gave us a
chance to have happiness at last.
After all, I had waited seventeen years, I could wait a little bit
longer.